5 years 5 months

I have nearly forgotten about this blog I started many years ago. And since that last post, 5 years, 5 months ago......Joe and I have allowed our lives to drastically change. We allowed ourselves to dive into the uncomfortable and embrace the unknown. Led by Dreams and backed by insane courage, we took leaps of  Faith. Leaps that are taking us on the most miraculous journey we could have ever imagined.

9 months ago, Joe and I welcomed into our lives, our home, our hearts and our family 3 little children needing a forever home to call their own.
9 months ago, our lives forever changed.
9 months ago, we began to experience, feel, change and endure emotions, milestones, challenges, hardships, loves, miracles and blessings we never had thought possible and some we thought we would only ever imagine.
9 months ago was a beginning and an end for us....

1 week ago, another beginning and end graced our presence as we went before a judge and made our new family official.
1 week ago, we continued to allow God to use us in ways we know will not only touch the lives of our 6 children but, with the ripple effect, will touch hundreds more.
1 week ago, we said 'I Do' to 3 little children in search of a forever home and became that forever home, through the good and the bad times. Just as no one can prepare you when you give birth to your first child, we know Nothing can prepare us for what lies ahead. But with Faith, love, belief and courage we will forge ahead knowing that God's Will will be done.

If someone had come to me and said I would be a mother to 6 children one day, I would have laughed at their obvious delusional thought. If someone had told me I would foster to adopt some of my children one day, I would have said 'Nope, not us'. If someone had told me in the years to come God had in store for us a way to serve Him mightier than any way we had yet done, I never would have imagined that way would include giving ourselves to those in need in the capacity that we have.

But someone did come to us 1 year ago, after God opened our hearts and minds to not only adoption but fostering to adopt, and asked us to consider taking in a sibling set of 3. Our very initial thoughts were.....3 MORE children.....where would we put them, how will we feed them, How do we provide for 3 MORE children?! And after that initial shock of the mere number of children that would bring our household to, God gently nudged us and reminded us that ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.’(Matthew 25:40). We had that someone place our home study on that sibling group for review and of those received, ours was selected. It wasn't a long or tedious road for us from that point forward, even though when you are in the midst of the unknown it does feel as if it is long and tedious. A mere month later we were meeting those children, being introduced to them as their 'forever home' and their 'new mommy and daddy'. A short month and a couple visits after they were placed with us as a foster care placement. Legally we were bound to foster them for 6 months before we were allowed to adopt. During that time Birth parents surrendered their rights, an incredibly noble and respectable action that we never anticipated happening but so grateful did. After that life changing action, the birth parents were allowed one last visit and said good bye to their children. I can not even imagine how hard, heart wrenching and devastating that was for them. "A Child born to another woman calls me mom. The depth of the tragedy and the magnitude of the privilege are not lost on me' (-Jody Landers)

The road has been a roller coaster of emotions, thoughts and events. Taking on 3 children that have had a traumatic past and potentially experienced things that Joe and I, as adults, never have endured and who had been, so far, raised by more than one family in many different environments, with different expectations and rules(or lack there of) was only the very tip of the ice burg. The ice burg our lives crashed into when we closed our eyes and held Gods hand as He began to walk us down the path He has planned for us. I say crashed, not as if God was misleading, but because we felt we were blindly walking into this journey, trusting in God yes, but feeling very vulnerable and naive in the process we were partaking in. After the tip of the ice burg was addressed and understood, we learned that all ice burgs have massive bases under the surface of the water. Bases not seen initially and definitely not seen if one does not delve into the depths of sea to find it. The moment we told that someone to place our home study on these children, we knew we would be delving into the depths of the sea with them, because giving up on them was not an option, turning back was not part of plan and being weak in the face of fear, hardships and trials was not even on our radar. When we began to dive further into the sea, chipping away at this ice burg, we met challenges face on, we stayed true to all 6 of our children and taught them to never back down, to never give up, to face your fears and let God take a front seat in your life. We taught them that even though things may seem hard or challenging, that you can and will get through them. That even when times are tough and every ounce of your being may want to throw in the towel, don't, because triumph lies on the other side of the trial.

Thank you dear friends for all the prayers and love and support you have offered. It was felt, appreciated and loved throughout this process and will continue to be throughout the next several months as we adjust to our new beginning. Love you all!

Update....

Can it seriously be April already?! I have not posted a blog since January and honestly it is due to me forgetting all about my blogspot! Hard to believe, guess I have so much going on that it took the back burner for a bit.
Well, a lot has happened since Blake's first birthday. Him walking for starters. A week long visit from Noni during spring break. A trip to Knoxville(mini vacation as the girls called it). And now SNOW in April! We are also redoing our half bath, that is almost finished! Thank you Paula for all your help!
Katie is going to go on her FIRST feild trip and ride a school bus for the first time on Wednesday April 8th. They are going to the Tivoli, Ally and I will meet them over there and watch the show with them! They are going to the zoo later in April. She will be starting Kindergarten at St Jude in the fall and is very excited to be attending the same school her mommy went to.
Ally is loving her new teacher at PDO....considering it is her MomMom.....it is not surprise!
Pictures to come as I decided which ones out of the hundreds to post!

ONE year?!

Blake turned ONE year old on January 8th. ONE year! Where did the time go?

As I sit here and try to think of something witty or elegnat to write, all I can think of is

the bitter sweetness of my little baby turning into a toddler, a little boy. The things he does now, fights off his sisters, loves hammers and anything with wheels, can devour any food you put in front of him faster then you can give it to him, is trying his darndest to walk, climbs...climbs like his sisters never even attempted, crawls faster then I can walk at times, head butts with his daddy, gives the sweetest little kisses, hates getting his diaper changed and can make a mess in less then a minute.

The more the time flies by, the more babytraits are replaced by boy traits. I am watching a little boy form right before my eyes. I never imagined how different my little boy could be from my little girls. After we had Ally, I was shocked how two sisters from the same parents could be so very different. And surprisingly I have been shocked again by the vast difference my little boy has shown me thus far.

Blake found a strong love for Cake, pizza, strawberry flavored milk, hamburgers, french toast and anything else that his sisters eat! We have been feeding him anything and everything we eat the last couple weeks and he is loving it. I never would have dreamed of feeding some of those things to the girls this soon. But my little man spits out any baby or baby grauate food you try to give him, taking 'real' table food any day.

We threw him a huge birthday bash...two of them actually. One a couple days before his birthday for family and another a few ays after for all our friends and extended family. He had a blast playing with balloons, opening presents, eating cake and getting more attention then he knew how to handle. Thank you all who were part of those celebrations, it means a lot to us!

Christmas past

So I noticed my last post mentioned that Blake was going to get tubes. He did in the middle of November and he has had 2 ear infections since. The tubes make it where the fluid from the infection drains out so it is not trapped in the ear. So he only required antibiotics in the form of an ear drop. He had his ears checked yesterday and now they are perfect! I am so excited. That means this is the first time in almost 5 months his ears have been clean and clear!
Ally finished potty training. She has random accidents but for the most part has done fantastic! She also has been having several ear infections and fluid in her ears the last couple months. And what worries the doctor about hers is she does not complain about it, it does not hurt or bother her. Why that is bad I am not sure but she has to see the ENT in 2 weeks(After her 3rd round of antibiotics). SHe had tubes last fall('07) that fell out in 6 months. They normally would like for the tubes to last 2 or so years. So there is the possibility she will need to get another set of tubes soon. The Doctor thinks that her ear problems off and on since she was a baby is contributing to her lack of speech. In addition to having an older sister, being shy and stubborn.
Katie's Christmas break is almost over and I have had so much fun having her home 24/7. I will miss her when she starts back to school!
We had a wonderful Christmas. We spent Christmas Eve with my family, had a wonderful home cooked(by mom) dinner and opened a couple presents. We also had an array of different treats to munch on mom made for us all! On the way home the girls and I watched for Christmas lights. Christmas we spent the morning at home having some wonderful quality family time, opening gifts and playing with the kids new toys. Then went to my parents for lunch and to open more presents for the kids.
Now it is New Years Day. I can not believe how fast time flies. Last night we went to a friends home where the kids played with some friends and we socialized with ours. We were hpme by 9pm and let the kids lay in bed with us till the ball dropped. We slept in this morning had a special(fatty and full of sugar!) breakfast for a treat, had lunch with my family and helped do some cleaning at the church nursery(they are rennovating it). Then off to Play World Down under for a play date and home for dinner of left overs and family play time.
Katie goes back to school Wednesday. We plan to do some more fun things before she starts back. Although I will be sad, she said she misses her teacher and wants to go back!

UPDATE

Children.....what a Blessing, a miracle, a heartfelt joy. Not a right, a privilege.
A privilege so many take for granted.
I try, on a daily basis, to do something fun with my babies and really appreciate the blessings I have in my life. During the day to day monotony it is so hard to do so unless we make conscience effort to.

I started to potty train Ally Monday, November 3rd. Today, Monday November 10th she has not had a single accident and I consider her completely potty trained! =] (except for at night...that will be a work in progress I am sure)

Blake went to the ENT today and is starting her 6th ear infection in three months. He started a 6th round of antibiotics and will be having surgery to get tubes Wednesday November 19th. Please keep him in your prayers. I Pray the tubes help him and he does not have another ear infection for a very long time and doe snot require another antibiotic for a few months.

A Whirlwind

Last weekend we had all kinds of Halloween activities planned for the kids to take part in. But alas, all but Ally became sick with food poisoning. Thankfully before we became ill though we did get to enjoy Boo in the Zoo. The girls had a lot of fun playing the carnival games, riding the pony and getting TONS of candy.This weekend was Halloween.
Friday was packed full of fun to make up for last weekend. A costume parade Toys R Us, dinner with family, trick or treating in a friends neighborhood. The girls got so much candy we will still be loaded down with it this time next year I am sure! LOL
This week Katie was awarded the Responsibility Character trait award at her school, in addition to a Tiny Tiger award for good behavior and a Perfect Attendance award.
Saturday was the last soccer game and she was presented with a Fall 2008 Rug Rats Team award for participation.Isnt fall so much fun, piles of leaves to jump in, nice cool weather to play in, colors all around.What a beautiful time of year!

PUMPKINS

Can you believe that last fall/halloween I forgot to get pumpkins with my girls?!
I was prego is the only excuse I have. I can not believe I forgot such a fun Halloween tradition.
Well, this year I was determined NOT to forget. And since the closest pumpkin farms are hour or more away from us, we went to our local farmer's market and the kids all picked their favorite pumpkin to take home to carve for Halloween.
We also picked out two smaller ones to place on the porch for a little fall decorating.
WHen we were done we went inside and picked out some fruit and veggies and the cashier gave each of the kids a piece of fruit to snack on . It was a nice afternoon.

Halloween

We are all ready for Halloween! We have the next two weekends jam pack planned with Halloween fun! Trick or Treating at RiverPark, Rivermont Fall carnival, Boo in the Zoo, Trunk or Treating, carving our pumpkins and more!
My little girls are Disney Princesses this year. I have avoided this in years past since the Disney Princesses are so popular, I wanted my girls to be something more unique. But this year a Snow White costume was loaned to us so I figured why not, it is free! So Ally will be Snow White with little red sparkle shoes(the shoes are a big deal!) and Katie Cinderella. She begged to be Cinderella and I found a dress on Ebay for cheap that came with a wand so, Cinderella it is!
Blake growels. It is one of his favorite things to do it seems, so my dad suggested he dress up as a bear for Halloween. So, a Bear is what he will be. Although he is not to fond of his costume.

Vacation

Aw, the sweet smell of the ocean air, the sound of the waves hitting the sand. The laughter of my children as they chase after them and then the cry's that follow as the waves come back in as if they are chasing my girls. Sea shells and handfuls of sand were the best souvienour they came back with and pictures of my babies on the beach were mine.
We spent the weekend at Myrtle Beach. A short, jam packed weekend that was bitter sweet in length. Just long enough to get to ejnoy it and just short enough to be ready to get home but once home wishing for more beach time. Dont many things in life happen this way?!
Blake stood on the beach for the first time at 9 months old. I sat him in the sand at one point and he put his hand down and immediatly picked it back up starring in surprise. Then started touching the sand on his hand trying to figure out what it was....it was too adorable.
We enjoyed listening to the waves as we drifted to sleep, drifting down the lazy river pool, splashing in the 'hot' tub, walking the shoreline, playing minature golf, exploring the hotel and visiting the nearby Hershey Ice Cream Parlor in addition to gift shops. We had a blast. What a great mini vacation to kick off this beautiful fall season!

Fall activities

So this blog is suppose to be an update on what my kiddos are doing....and I have slacked in the posting department lately. So here is a run down on what we have done the last few weeks.
Spring and Fall are my favorite seasons. The wonderful weather makes it so nice to do outdoor activities. Thankfully my kids like to be outside too!
We went to the county fair a few weekend ago and the girl enjoyed pony rides and Nana's frozen yogurt. A nice picnic and a tractor ride may have been the highlight of the day.
The following weekend we went to the Hixson community carvinal where they got to pet and feed goats, ride another pony, get their face painted, play games and win prizes, do a craft get a sno cone...ALL for free!!!
We enjoyed the Enchanted Miaze this past weekend. The corn maize, pizza lunch, hay ride, tractor ride and stealing a corn cob!
This coming weekend we are blessed to have been asked to go to Myrtle Beach. We are SO very excited. We have not been on a vacation in so very long!
Next week I plan to let the girls pick out a pumpkin and carve it next weekend. Can you believe I forgot to get pumpkins last year?! I think I had prego memory. So this year I am determined to let the girls pick one out!

Weekend Fun

Weekends are generally packed full of family togetherness. Last weekend we had Katie's soccer game and a special lunch out. A birthday party and a very realxing picnic at the park. This weekend we ended up doing the same thing! Except had our picnic at the County Fair at Chester Frost Park. It is so nice to be able to spend some time together since Joe works so much during the week. The weekend is kind of like our wind down time, getting us ready for another jam packed busy week.
Mondays for the kids and I consist of: 6:30am getting 5 people up, ready and out of the house before 8am. Taking the katie to school. Going to the gym for an hour or so. Mom and Tots play date. picnic lunch. Naptime. Pick Katie up from school. Art/Craft or TV time. Play time. Dinner time. Bath time. Bed time.
Then...to start all over again with few variations each day.
Tuesdays I take an aerobics class.
Wednesdays Ally and I go to Lapsit at the Library. And Katie has cubbies that evening while I attend a moms book club.
Thursdays and Fridays I work.
Hence, why the weekends are so nice to one, have joe there and two have the help joe brings. It is so exhausting to have all three babies. But nothing I would ever take for granted!
Looking forward to this fall weather! We love to go to parks and the nice weather will make that so much more enjoyable!

A great Mama?!

I am fighting a battle, a battle that I feel I have lost too many times during the short time I have been a mother.

Tha Battle?
What makes a great Mama?

Is it the smell of something yummy baking as you enter their home? Is it a clean home or chores that are always complete? Is it a manicured yard or even just the yard trimmed? An upkept mother and ironed clothes for every family member? Is it a homemade dinner on the table every night? Each child participating in everyextracirricuuler activity? A solid routine for which the children follow strictly day in and day out?

Is it the sound of happy children at any hour of the day? Is it a little bit of chaos while an art or craft is being so happily completed by little hands even though the dishes need to be done? Is it playing in the floor with your little ones even though laundry is undone. Is it playing Candy Land one more time instead of vacuuming? Is it cuddling as you read a book for the millionth time instead of mopping?

I feel it is letting the laundry sit while I play with my little ones. Not worrying about the dishes in the sink while I cuddle on the cough with my babies. Forgetting about the mess while I read them a story or paint with them.

Time flies by, the laundry will be there later, the dishes can wait and the vacuuming can be done another time. My little ones will only be a little for a short amount of time. They will not be 4yrs 4 months and 2 weeks old, 2 yrs, 3 months and 1 day old, and 8 months 2 weeks and 2 days old tomorrow.
And as much as I struggle with the battle of what makes a great mama....deep down I know that my children come first. I should be proud of the 'art work' all over the house, the mess in the girls room, the stains on the rugs and the sticky spots on the kitchen floor and chaos that is my life and home.
For Today is a gift, tomorrow a mystery and yesterday a memory to be cherished forever.
Make every moment count and a memory that you can rely on to get you through the tough times.
It is so hard for me to let the dishes go, the cleaning slide and the laundry pile up. I feel I need to 'impress' others. But what I need to remember is my kids are little treasures that need me more then the house needs cleaning. That need to be held before the things are straightened up. As long as the house is livable and lived in.....nothing else should matter over my babies.
I know this....now that battle of making sure I do this.

Kids

I cut Katie's hair Monday night. I probably chopped a good 3-4 inches or more off. I am a poor judge of length. But it is now at her shoulders when dry. Of course I cut it when it was wet and she was looking at the ceiling! I was so frustrated that she was looking up...i did not relize she had moved her head till after I snipped. It looks good though. It was almost a year since the first 'real' haircut I gave her. Then I cut it shorter then I had wanted as well.
But she gets hot easily so this will help her stay a little cooler and it will grow out by winter.

Blake started crawling this weekend. He is doing very well now. Gets most everywhere he wants to go in the room in which he is in. I am going to be putting the play pen to more use now! lol
He is teething again, wont let me sit him down for even a minute. Wearing on my nerves for sure. Porr little guy must be in some pain but when I pick him up when he is screming he immediatly stops, smiles and laughs. Joe thinks it is funny and says he has me wrapped around his finger....I do not think it to be so amusing. =/

Time Flies

I sit here thinking of yesterday....or what can seem like yesterday. The days when i was young. Our childhood is gone in a blink of an eye. It feels like just the other day Katie bug was a tiny baby in my arms. My first born little bundle of joy.
And now my 3rd, and last, little baby, in a matter of a month, has sat up, started scooting, is trying to crawl and is pulling up on everything. My baby girl is talking up a storm, sentences and phrases I never knew she knew. And my sweet princess is going to school. Oh my, where does that time go?!
Just last week I was playing on the trampoline in out backyard with a water hose and my sis and bro. Or a couple months ago I was watching Annie water our TV with the same water hose. lol Or last year I was celebrating my very first Christmas(although I do not remember it).
I can not believe that so much can happen in such a short amount of time. In what seems like a lifetime when you are in the moment goes by faster then we can even imagine.
I am 28 yrs old, but feel like I am still 18. I am scared to grow old, mainly because it happens so fast and also because it is an unkown. Unkown because I have never been there, felt it, experienced it. So much unknown. So many years that will fly by faster then a speeding bullet. So much to do and see....so little time.
Life is short. Live it, Love it and never regret what made you smile!

Family and Birthday

My mother's birthday was yesterday(September 8th) The kids and I went over to my parents house and made them a spaghetti dinner and cake to celebrate.
Then tonight, the kids, joe and I met my sister, brother and Addison at my parents house for a surprise 'party' for my mom. We had another cake, the girls decorated it, drinks and ice cream for all. I think we really surprised her and she enjoyed having us all together for her. =]

In May for Dad's birthday we did a similar thing. We went to Chester Frost Park and got a pavalion. Every day when dad got off work he would go visit my brother who was a ranger there(he is a cop with Red Bank now). Well, that day when he went to talk Mom had decorated the pavilion, grilled hot dogs and had a cake with much much more to surprise him. He was so not expecting that! =]

We love family get togethers. It allows us to spend that time together that we rarely get to spend together due to hectic lives. I wish Joe's family was closer to us so that we could do the same with them. But at least occasional visits take place to make up for it.

I ask Katie and Ally every night what their favorite part of the day was and they always say spending time with their family, or a certain activity they did with family that day or spending time with a certain family member that day. I am so glad that at such a young age they realize the importance of family.

Gym

Aerobics....I am not coordinated enough for anything. Although I attempted an aerobics class today. To my surprise it was actually fun...exhausting...hard...and helped me realize just how horribly OUT of shape I am! I am so sore now....... I plan to attend the class once a week! =] At least that way I will work through the soreness. hehe

I also have 3 personal trainer appointments. One I had last week and my next one tomorrow. I enjoyed getting to learn how to correctly use the gym equipment and then feel confident and comfortable enough to go back and try it by myself.

I really need to do this for myself, to get myself back in shape and back in the shape I want to be in after having three kids. It is some great me time too!

Ally loves playing in the nursery and Blake gets lots of attention in the infant room due to his charming smile, handsome laugh and head full of hair.

Sunday afternoons

Oh, How I love lazy sunday afternoons.
We go to mass almost every sunday morning, then try and do something fun with the girls. Like go to lunch, have a picnic, go to a park, go to the mall play area....ect
Well, today we went to Riverpark and had a nice picnic lunch next to the river. It was a perfect breezy day to do so. Then we walked a bit and treated the girls to ice cream for behaving so well. They played on the playground for a bit and then we headed home for naps and relaxing.
Sundays are our family time. I cherich it so very much. With the amount of work Joe does during the week the kids and I have little to no time like that with him during the week. But it is a sacrifice we are willing to take for a better future.

I forgot to mention that I took Blake to have his ears checked Friday afternoon. He had been waking in the night the weekend before last, I took him to the doc cause after the 3rd night of this he woke with congestion that was a little green and a low grade temp. He ended up having a double ear infection that was caused by a cold he showed no signs of having other then a very slight clear runny nose. They put him on amoxicillian and at the end of the ten days(friday) I took him back for a re-check cause hs started to wake in the night again and his runny nose came back. So, he still(or again) has ear infections and they put him on another form of Amoxicillian....I did not know that existed. They want to check him again in 3-5 wks.
While we were there I wanted Ally's ears checked as well cause she and Katie had apparantly caught the cold and had runny noses earlier in the week. Although Ally;s was worse and she was very congested and had a cough on top of it. Ally's ears checked our ok but Katie's (she didnt want to be left out of the ear checking!) were not so good. She also had double ear infections and never once said her ears hurt! So, she is also on an antibiotic and since we just finished 3 rounds of antibiotics jsut 2-3 weeks ago trying to rid her of an ear infection....she has to see an ENT specialist in a couple of weeks. She may have to get tubes like Ally did last fall.
My poor babies and their ear troubles.....

Soccer

Katie had her first soccer game yesterday. She and her daddy ran around the field practicing and then playing a short scrimmage. I, Ally, Blake and Mom and Teresa sat on the sidelines watching and cheering. It was great to see her participating in a sport Joe enjoyed so much in his younger years. The jersey, shorts and socks were huge on her and it looked like she had short stuby legs. hehe
She loved it though and can not wait until next week!
She has games every saturday(except 10/11) at 10am until the last week in october or so.

In addition to Soccer Katie is in Awanas Cubbies program again this year.
They meet every wednesday night and have a little book they do a chapter in each week. They learn a verse to recit to their teacher each week and learn various games and songs.
Last year Katie was only in Cubbies for about 6 wks and learned all 30 or so versuses that all the other kids learned that whole yr in thos few weeks. The teacher was so impressed with her they want her to do a book in addition to the book that everyone does this year! She is so excited! =]

Katie

My little photographer.....Katie loves to take pictures. Whether it be with our camera, her camera or my phone. She is little miss creativity. She loves to draw, "do her homework"(she does not have homework), color, paint, play on my laptop, memorize her versus for cubbies(which she did so well last year the teacher wants her to do an additional book from the rest of the class, where she would memorize extra versuses each week) and much more. i posted pics that she took herself with my camera phone. =]